Anyone who knows me, works with me, or spends any time with me knows I am super positive and I believe in the magical powers of manifestation. I have seen over and over in my life signs of what direction to take, and listened. I have never been disappointed. I believe what we give our attention to in a loving kind way grows, and what pisses us off continues to amass itself into a real cluster fuck of a problem.
That said, every once in a while I think life warrants a moment of suckery, just so one can then turn back towards what is really working in their lives. I have therefore made an “It sucks” list hoping I can motivate you to do the same. This list saves you from endlessly complaining to friends or family about what you think is lame about life. No one wants to hear it, and you don’t need to project it out into the Universe that is just waiting to rain all the gifts of abundance and happiness down on you. I surely want nothing to be a cog in the wheel of how good my life continues to be and what shows up that is super awesome and delicious. So this is your private one-off suck fest that you can feel good about for one hour of one day.
My It Sucks List:
Getting old sucks. I don’t care how hot you look, and if your body is rocking it from finding The Class on line or mastering Ashtanga Yoga. My left knee hurts for no reason, and I am randomly constipated. What sucks more is feeling in the inside like you are 25 on all kinds of levels, and being in a moment of celebration at the dinner/party/event, and you catch a glimpse of yourself in the mirror, and you are like who the fuck is that old person?
Being apart from someone you are falling in love with sucks. I am 53 years old. When I find my person, I am ready. Let’s do this. Games out the window. But there are logistics of their house and your house, and their kids and your kids. It’s pretty ridiculous frankly to be in such authority in all areas of your life and in this one to have to feel like a teenager who has a car and cash. Did I say it’s ridiculous?
Constipation sucks. Because it can be tricky and sneaky. One minute you are in the flow and the next you are bottled up like you had a constant diet of donuts. Yes, it may be an indicator of clenching within to have control but I am happy to have no control over anything to just be regular. They say menopause has something to do with it so add that to the suck list.
What stuff costs sucks. When did life get so insanely expensive? I am actively these days looking more at beach days for no cost, bike rides, and generally spending more time cuddling and kissing which are free and greatly underrated. Why go to a $45 movie when I can make out for two hours?
Migrating one computer to the other sucks. Especially when there is a glitch and they tell you that you better back up everything because there could be loss. You are also penalized going from an old computer to a new computer when you are too organized with your mail folders. They suggest you stop being so organized and let the servers just download emails. In other words, stop being so constipated.
People not telling you what they really think sucks. Can we go back to NYC circa 1990 when everyone told everyone what they thought about them right on the city streets? Candor? In person? This hiding behind texts and subterfuge is bullshit. I have been having a ball lately saying once what I don't like to people and watching them squirm and dance when I don’t go on and on in justification. I have justified most of my life. I am done.
So here’s to rising above suck city and stopping complaining. Let stuff pass through you and focus on the good that is going on. Drone out the noise of people who are complaining, because they may be in their own suck city. It’s not your suck city. And spend more time making out, eating ice cream, taking a laxative or two, and generally laughing about how you just went out with your torso exposed in a half shirt in your fifties… and liked it.
I was featured in ChicagoWrites this week! I appreciate my fellow writer Samantha Hoffman for giving me the space to write about essay and the inception story of this column! https://www.chicagowrites.org/blog/entry/showcase-your-writing